The Five Lessons Learned from Being a Dad

Although there are thousands of lessons learned, here are my top five lessons learned from being a dad.

Anything you thought you did to prepare for having a baby was not as beneficial as you thought.

I have said it before and I will say it again, owning a dog is nothing like having a kid. It is exhausting how many times I have heard the dog thing. Seriously, that’s like telling someone “Good thing you went for your first walk today since you have that marathon next week.” Yes, having a dog is a step in the right direction for having a kid. But, by no means are they the same type of responsibility. In fact, I had three younger sisters (my littlest is 12 years younger), worked at a daycare, coached sports, and had (and have) dogs. All of those things were a great way to learn about responsibility. NONE of those things were the same as having our this little monster.

It is incredibly easy to be seen as a good dad – the same is not true for a mom

It is truly an unfair advantage that we have as dads over moms. In order for us to look like super dads, all we really need to do is show up to things, smile and play with our kids. If you were to get crafty and build a tree house for the kids, holy smokes! I can’t even imagine the number of fans you would have in the neighborhood. Mostly, having your friend’s wives ask your wife how did she got so lucky.

However, the same is not true for moms. I push the stroller through town and change diapers in public. And, I have been complimented by total strangers. However, when my wife does the same no one compliments her – ever.

I can only imagine that one of two things is happening here.

Either, we, as a society, have decided that these tasks are a mom’s responsibility. We have reached a point where we don’t even acknowledge a mom changing a diaper, pushing a stroller, or shopping with their kids. Or, worse, us dads have become so complacent with our parenting that anything we do is viewed as going out of our way to be great dads.

Neither of these should feel comfortable to anyone but especially the dads. It’s time to make a change and raise the expectations of ourselves. But, don’t get me wrong, building a treehouse should still earn us giant brownie points. Great forts don’t just build themselves.

You can find yourself being incredibly content just watching your kid go about their day

There was a day when going out with our friends, bar hopping the night away, was the most fun we can image. We would spend all week looking forward to the weekend when we would go out with our friends again. Now that we have a kid, my ideal night is spent eating Chipotle while watching Frozen for the hundredth time. More importantly, watching my little monster sing every word.

Where I used to find contentment in the work week, I now find while watching my little girl go about her day. There are the times you can’t help but shake your head and wonder how you could have possibly had a hand in creating such an amazing tiny human.

(Almost) everyone makes parenting look easier and more stress-free than it really is

It does start to get a little obnoxious when you watch movies or TV shows that include babies when you have one of your own. If you’re like me you end up spending so much time passive aggressively telling the TV “Oh yeah that baby would total just sit there during that entire conversation.” Or, “Absolutely, my toddler wouldn’t be running around that store like a crazy person either.”

Between these shows and people only sharing the best news on social media (you’re not hiding anything) it can be hard to determine what raising kid will really be like. Well let me tell you, it is the greatest pain in the ass.

Your feelings about your significant other before baby will be tested and magnified every minute of every day

I overheard someone recently make a comment regarding how they had been having a rough patch in their relationship. She thought that now that she was having their baby things would get better. In most scenarios, this is not the case. Anything you have felt for your significant other is brought out of you faster and larger than you could imagine.

This is not always about the negative things. In a lot of cases, it can be a great thing. My wife is the best. She has put up with my craziness for a long time and the same is true the other way around. The day our child was born my eyes were opened again. Watching her grow from my wife into the mother of our child is one of the best experiences of my life. I thank her every day for being who she is.

Even better, my wife shares my joy (and pain) in raising our kid. I can’t ask for anything better than that.

When you put your relationship under the microscope of exhaustion and stress, then mix in a screaming baby your feelings about your spouse will magnify, good or bad.

These are just a few of the lessons learned from being a dad. There are a lot of little things about being a parent that are stressful and wonderful at the same time. Take each day in stride. Most importantly, remember, you created this tiny human and every step is more rewarding than you could imagine.