Gender stereotypes are decreasing in today’s world, especially when compared to our parents and grandparents lifetime. It has been a welcomed change with a long way to go but strides are being made every day. But what about in the way we raise our kids? With the exception of a handful of non-gender-specific trends that swept the nation, the toys, clothing, books and the way they are marketed is largely the same as it has always been.
How do we change it?
Well, looking at the business world, we don’t. At least not quickly. They market products that way because it works. Making it work let’s them keep their jobs. So in the short term, there isn’t much we can do to influence big business.
However, we all know to be successful you have to focus on the long game. Business’ will change the marketing when society changes. Although this will take a while, we can start making some changes right at home.
What does this mean for our boys?
It means they stop relying on a future of girls being the only ones who can cook dinner, clean the house, and take care of the kids. So let your boys take a cooking class, learn to clean a toilet, fold their laundry, and teach them that they don’t put the dishes in the sink when they have a dishwasher (my wife hates this but I’m learning).
Now, I’m not going as bold as to say go buy Barbies for your little guy but maybe we don’t jump so fast to pull one away and mutter the phrase “that’s a girls toy!”
It also important to teach our boys that girls play sports too just like they like math, enjoy science, know cars, and understand business. When they take a hit in the backfield teach them not to be shocked when they get up to see the girl from the track team turned in her spikes for a set of shoulder pads and a helmet. Embrace it, support it, and encourage it.
What else? Well, gender stereotyping works for both sexes. So what if you have a little dude with an appreciation for something outside the world of sports and cars? Again, embrace it, support it, and encourage it. If they like to dance – dance, if they like to sing – sing, and if they want to paint – let the kid paint. Let them have the choice to try whatever they want. Boys options are not limited to what society has deemed as masculine.
What does this mean for our girls?
It means they can be badass’ too.
They can take a slapshot instead always feeling like their options are limited. A job as an engineer or an electrician is no longer limited to the gender who was constantly given LEGOs and Lincoln Logs as kids.
Teach your girls to have confidence in who they are. And, let her have a choice in what she wants to do over what she “should” be doing.
Will your sweet little girl be a rocket scientist, a professional athlete, a comedian, an artist, or a CEO? Who knows. One guarantee is you’re raising a little girl who will break down barriers for future girls after her.
What does this mean for me?
Ultimately, more well-rounded kids. If we give our kids the chance to choose their passions without judgment and teach our kids to treat each other as peers with different interests we will win the long game.
Just as we learn a large amount from the environment around us, so do our little monsters. Our culture has already built such large gender stereotypes that it will be an uphill battle. Why continue the stereotyping and be an additional obstacle in the way of the same kid that looks at you like the greatest superhero on earth.
Boys and girls are really not all that different. We have made great progress in understanding this but we still have a long way to go. Be a part of the change, not another obstacle for the kid who already has it hard enough to grow up with a different point of view.